food quotes

If you do make a list, the store will be out of your most important item
-- Murphy's Food Laws n°11

If you can afford it, it's out of season
-- Murphy's Food Laws n°3

BOO! We changed Coke again! BLEAH! BLEAH!

Every recipe ever written includes one ingredient that you do not have in your kitchen
-- Murphy's Food Laws n°5

The "Fast lane" isn't
-- Murphy's Food Laws n°17

Every time I lose weight, it finds me again!

Consider the following axioms carefully:
"Everything's better when it sits on a Ritz."
and
"Everything's better with Blue Bonnet on it."
What happens if one spreads Blue Bonnet margarine on a Ritz cracker? The
thought is frightening. Is this how God came into being? Try not to
consider the fact that "Things go better with Coke".

Never eat anything bigger than your head.

The number of coupons of the person in front of you is directly proportional to how much of a hurry you're in
-- Murphy's Food Laws n°15

If you waste your time cooking, you'll miss the next meal.

My favorite sandwich is peanut butter, baloney, cheddar cheese, lettuce
and mayonnaise on toasted bread with catsup on the side.
-- Senator Hubert Humphrey

A new chef from India was fired a week after starting the job. He
kept favoring curry.

The cow is nothing but a machine which makes grass fit for us people to eat.
-- John McNulty

Without coffee he could not work, or at least he could not have worked in the
way he did. In addition to paper and pens, he took with him everywhere as an
indispensable article of equipment the coffee machine, which was no less
important to him than his table or his white robe.
-- Stefan Zweigs, Biography of Balzac

It was a brave man that ate the first oyster.

Where do you go to get anorexia?
-- Shelley Winters

"How did you spend the weekend?" asked the pretty brunette secretary
of her blonde companion.
"Fishing through the ice," she replied.
"Fishing through the ice? Whatever for?"
"Olives."

Peanut Blossoms

4 cups sugar 16 tbsp. milk
4 cups brown sugar 4 tsp. vanilla
4 cups shortening 14 cups flour
8 eggs 4 tsp. soda
4 cups peanut butter 4 tsp. salt

Shape dough into balls. Roll in sugar and bake on ungreased cookie
sheet at 375 F. for 10-12 minutes. Immediately top each cookie with a
Hershey's kiss or star pressing down firmly to crack cookie. Makes a
heck of a lot.

Is there life before breakfast?

Most people eat as though they were fattening themselves for market.
-- E.W. Howe