shlomif quotes

He has a high degree of idealism, a high degree of stubbornness, and an even
higher degree of inability to distiniguish between the two.

Shlomi Fish

Had I not been already insane, I would have long ago driven myself mad.

"The Enemy and how I Helped to Fight It"
Shlomi Fish

The government of the Supporter will finance your travel, and you will be
able to leave tomorrow morning. We would like to inform you of the following
facts: we cannot assure your safety during this travel. Furthermore,
despite your long service at the Organization and your constructive
proposal, we cannot say, wholeheartedly or halfheartedly, that we wish
to protect your safety. Likewise, we cannot guarantee that we would not
take actions that may harm you, indirectly or in a direct manner.

We hope to see you here very soon.

"The Enemy and how I Helped to Fight It"
Shlomi Fish

What happened to Christopher Michael Pilato?
Is he gone?
Is he gone for good?
Is he gone for better?
Is he gone for best?
Is he gone forever?
Will he return?
Who is Christopher Michael Pilato, anyway?

Shlomi Fish

Oh! I wish you could see the look on his face! Actually, I would have also
liked to see the look on his face, but just then I woke up from the dream.

"The Enemy and how I Helped to Fight It"
Shlomi Fish

An apple a day keeps the doctor away.
Two apples a day will keep two doctors away.

Sometimes you don't need to be familiar with a better alternative to know
that something sucks. Take Microsoft Word for example.

Eran Keidar

"Likewise." Added the interviewer and said: "Your answers were also very ...
unusual."

"Although this description cannot testify on their quality, I take it as a
compliment."

"The Enemy and how I Helped to Fight It"
Shlomi Fish

I know I'm blond, but I have to colour my hair brown, so people whould
not think I'm stupid. Because, like the title of the book says: "You've only
got Three Seconds".

Actually, since Amazon sent us two books like that, you've only got six
seconds.

If it isn't in my email, it doesn't exist.

And if the whole world says one thing and my email says something different,
email will conquer.

> Can anyone draw a plan as to how to teach a computer to laugh? Say we
> define laugh as print "LOL", and define smile as print ":)". How would a
> computer know when to print any of those, and when to operate an Eliza
> program?

Judging by IRC or AOL, randomly would do just fine ;-)

Muli Ben-Yehuda in Hackers-IL message No. 3513

Objective philosophy is like a pencil sharpener for one's mind.

Shlomi Fish

"Except for that, I planned a political simulator that forecast the two World
Wars after I entered all the relevant data until the year 1000 AD."

"Do you have a computer at home?"

"Oh no. At present the program is written on a paper. Don't ask how much
time it took me to take out all the bugs from it. But it was great fun!"

"The Enemy and how I Helped to Fight it"
Shlomi Fish

Linus Torvalds: "95% of Programmers consider themselves in the top 5%".

Shlomi Fish' Corollary: "95% of Programmers consider 95% of the code they
did not write, in the bottom 5%."

The first phrase that need to be taught when teaching a new language is how
to say "Do you speak English?".

The first thing that needs to be taught when teaching a new computer tool
is how to exit it.

Shlomi Fish

Jack: Hi, Sophie!

Sophie: Don't "Hi, Sophie!" me.

Jack: Don't "Don't 'Hi, Sophie!' me" me!

Shlomi Fish

There's no point in keeping an idea to yourself since there's a 10 to 1
chance that somebody already has it and will share it before you.

Shlomi Fish

I don't believe in fairies. Oops! A fairy died.
I don't believe in fairies. Oops! Another fairy died.

Shlomi Fish

mofino: I have some money, and am living and am supported
by my parents.
mofino: there's much less of a taboo against living with
one parents after school in Israel, than there is in the
States.
It's not taboo
It's pathetic.
Although, sometimes life sucks, and you have no choice.
you know, it depends
if you're not married and / or not getting any, it doesn't
much matter if you live with your folks
ender, usually when you have self-respect, you try and you
know, make it on your own
q[ender]: are you married and not getting any? You could
live with your parents.
hahaha
haha
awesome
rindolf++ # good burn!

-- Discussing living with one's parents on IRC.

Hacker sees bug. Hacker fixes bug.

Shlomi Fish